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Sleeping at night--NOT

Lucky
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 Joined: 2008-06-26
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(Alright...I think I've finally figured out how to post the right way!)

Hey all! I'm relatively new to the site. I'm a SAHD (2 years) to Lexi (4.5 yo) and Gideon (2 yo). What do you all think about the following:

Gideon is going through an unpleasant sleep phase these days. He's napping once/day in the afternoon (1.5-2 hrs) and that is staying relatively consistent. The problem is at night. He goes down well and is peaceful for a couple of hours, and then starts waking/crying/whining/screaming... off and on the rest of the night. Some nights it's just a few minutes. Some nights it's for hours. It was just about all night last night. Sometimes he'll self-soothe and all is well. Sometimes just checking on him will calm things down, even if only briefly. Sometimes checking on him just seems to make things worse. Sometimes it's a marathon to see who can hold out the longest (me, my wife, or Gideon--unfortunately the boy has a lot of stamina and a great set of lungs). A lot of times, he doesn't even seem to be awake. We went through a phase like this, briefly, with Lexi, and chalked it up to night tremors/nightmares. It was hard to wake her up, too, but once we did she would settle down and all could go back to sleep. Not so with Gideon...

I have a bad feeling we're just stuck with this until the phase passes, but...any suggestions?


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Submitted by Lucky on Fri, 07/11/2008 - 8:09am.

Mr. Dad
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Posts: 159
 Joined: 2008-03-07
 Dad Points: 224
Many Causes

It could be many reasons:

1. Nightmares - If this is it, you just have to wait it out. Try to comfort them. Our 17 month old has been waking up lately screaming. I usually get up, and I just give her her binky/nuk and give her a quick snuggle and lay her back down. If she tries to get back up, I lay her down again. After 2 or 3 times she gives up and stays laying down. Sometimes she cries as I leave, but within a minute she is quiet.

2. Teething - You might still be in that prime teething time. When we think our daughter is teething, we give her a dose of Motrin at bedtime, or when she wakes up at night. Seems to help quite a bit. When kids are teething, the pressure often builds withing their ears from the extra fluid drainage when they are laying down. You could try Motrin when he wakes. If he is better after a half hour or so, this might be the problem.

3. Hunger - Could be he is going through a growth spurt, and is just getting hungry at night. Everything I have read, you should avoid feeding them at night, because it trains them to always get up for a "midnight snack". If this is the problem, you will have to wait it out.

Regardless of the problem, our daughters both went through periods of waking at night. Sometimes it was a 1 week phase, and sometimes it was 2 months.


Fri, 07/11/2008 - 8:36am

Santiago
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 Joined: 2008-06-01
 Dad Points: 25
Have you tried...

I'd say move the nap earlier in the day, but if going to bed isn't an issue that might not help. You could always skip the nap one day and see what happens. It'll probably make the night much better, or much worse.

Whatever the case, I would definitely not give the kid a lot of nighttime stimulation in the form of food or excessive holding. That just seems to make them expect more of the same, making your problem worse.

It seems harsh (especially to the wife) but I've always had success with the Ferber method, even on older kids. It takes a couple nights to start working, but it has always fixed a sleeping problem around our house. You just have to stay strong when your wife disagrees with you, and figure out how to keep your other kids from waking up.

Good luck.


Fri, 07/11/2008 - 9:54am

Mr. Dad
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 Joined: 2008-03-07
 Dad Points: 224
Ferber Method Sounds good

I just read the link to Ferber Method from Santiago. This is basically what we did with both our daughters, but we didn't know it had a name. It just felt like the natural thing for us to do in order for them to sleep on their own. Even when our youngest wakes at night, she gets a brief snuggle (long enough to adjust her blankets in the crib) then we lay her back down.

Getting used to letting them cry a little can be tough, but the sooner you do it, the sooner you will sleep. In other words, I agree with Santiago.


Fri, 07/11/2008 - 12:20pm

Lucky
Posts: 10
 Joined: 2008-06-26
 Dad Points: 17
Thanks, guys!

Thanks for the input, guys (Mr Dad and Santiago). It's great what a little outside perspective and advice can do.

I didn't know the Ferber Method by name, either, but that's also essentially what we did (with great success) with our kids when they were younger. I just hadn't thought about needing to do that anymore.

I'm not sure if he's teething with molars, yet. It may be a little swollen in the back, but he's not pulling at his mouth or showing the other signs he's done before...but we gave him some ibuprofin last night when he got up and then he slept the rest of the night away...as did the rest of us.

Thanks again.


Sat, 07/12/2008 - 2:43pm

ticktock
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 Joined: 2006-11-06
 Dad Points: 1344
My suggestion if it fits...

Don't let him watch TV in the evening.
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http://www.altparenting.com


Mon, 07/14/2008 - 10:09am

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